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How to Beat a Narcissism: 14 Ways to Overcome Its Manipulation
Stop being played! It took you a while to figure out the narcissist in the crowd, but now you can learn how to beat a narcissist at their own game.
Sometimes we don't notice another person's true colors until we're too deep. Sometimes these narcissists can be people we love like a close friend or boyfriend. But you finally realized that this person is what they always were: a narcissist. And now you want to know how to beat a narcissist at their own game.
But before we even get to how you beat her * because you will beat her * let's just make a quick reminder of what a narcissist actually is. I'm not saying you don't know what it is, but this word gets tossed around so many times that the definition sometimes becomes blurred.
How to Beat a Narcissist
A narcissist is someone who suffers from Narcissistic Personality Disorder * NPD * but what exactly does that mean? Basically, a narcissist is someone with an excessive interest in themselves. In other words, they love themselves much, much more than they care about anyone. Narcissists don't care about their lover, best friend, or literally anyone else in the world unless they get some form of attention from them.
I mean, the definition comes from Greek mythology, where Narcissus fell in love with his own image in the reflection of the water. Are you coming where I am going? Your highly inflated sense of self worth and feelings for yourself are greatly inflated. They need to be fed with admiration from others, otherwise they will not be satisfied. Doesn't sound like someone you want to hang out with, so get started with ways to beat them in their own game.
# 1 You can't change them. That is the first thing you have to do recognize and fully accept. Trying to switch a narcissist is wasting your time. First of all, you are not a therapist. Second, this person doesn't want to change. You are in love with yourself. Have you ever tried to convince your boyfriend that the person he is in love with is not good for them? Yes, exactly, it's impossible.
# 2 Learn the traits. You need to know a narcissist's characteristics well enough to identify them in the person you are about to hit. Now everyone, including narcissists, is different. Therefore, they expose different properties from each other. Typically, narcissists lack empathy, use fear to control others, fail to admit mistakes, show negative reactions to criticism, and exploit others.
# 3 Don't reveal your feelings. Narcissists feed on information from others. They use information about you to get into your mind, create fear, and manipulate you. So, before you give your heart out and reveal all of your deepest, darkest secrets, don't do it. The only thing they do is gather information about you and find ways to exploit it for personal gain.
# 4 Break away from them. Listen, as much as you don't want to admit it, you're attached to them. It's not something to blame yourself for. They are very charming people so they are easy to fall for. But now accept that you are attached to them and detach yourself from them. Use emotional distance to stop a narcissist being manipulated.
# 5 Cut off contact. It will not be easy. They'll keep you within their reach for as long as they need you. So, if you cut off contact before they've completely used you, they'll try every trick in the book to make you stay. But cut contact, it's that simple. Cut off all ties. Remove them from all social media and refrain from replying to any of their progress.
# 6 If you can't leave them, learn how to handle them. In some cases, you won't be able to just let them fall out of your life. Maybe it's a family member or a colleague. If so, help them by developing their empathy. That means not to criticize them. Instead, encourages them to feel compassionate and helps them reduce their narcissism.
# 7 Be gentle. I know this sounds weird, but be gentle and kind to a narcissist when you are unable to break bonds. Remember, narcissists are not necessarily terrible people, as many of them came from a childhood that offered no support.
Let them feel the importance of relationships through kindness and love. However, this doesn't mean that you shouldn't be aware of their manipulative tactics.
# 8 empathy prompts. Psychologists found this to be the most successful way someone reduce narcissism. Empathy prompts come in two components: revealing your emotions and determining the importance of your relationship with them. Again, this does not mean that you are disclosing deep secrets, but you are saying, "You are important to me" or "You are important to me" or "I care a lot about you." That gives security.
# 9 Use "We." They are very focused on the "I" thoughts and phrases, so it is time to toggle them and use the "we" phrases. It helps them think about relationships. Most importantly, show them your love for them.
# 10 reward good behavior. I know this sounds a bit like training a dog, but it's not ... well, kind of. Forget it. The point is, if you focus a narcissist's attention away from yourself, reward them when they actually achieve that. When they show compassion or concern for the happiness of others, reward them with positive compliments.
# 11 Don't play. There's a game they play and so far you've played it. But now change the way you do things. Yes, you can help them. However, first make sure that you stop playing their game. Help them be their friend but be aware of the tactics they are using and make sure you don't resist their game.
# 12 Make yourself. Remember, if you want to help someone it is to put yourself first. It's easy to get lost with the idea of helping someone else.
Remember, you are a narcissist. Yes, help them, but always remember that they are looking for what they can get from you.
# 13 But when you're a full blown narcissist. Even if you may be saying the right things, there is little chance you will reduce your narcissism with your help. If so, they need professional therapy. Even then, the chances of reducing their narcissism are limited.
# 14 When you've exhausted your options, run. I'm sorry to say that but when you've tried everything this book will help you overcome your narcissistic tendencies and you've been to therapists but nothing works, it's time for you to go. It sounds harsh, but nothing is going to change. Your feelings and feelings will continue to be used for their own personal benefit.
Now that you know what to do while trying to figure out how to beat a narcissist and help them change you, you better get at it! It's time to finally beat them in their own game.
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